you. yeah.

The MLK effect

2012-01-16T08:52:00.000-08:00

Let's take race out of this for a second. I want to remove the precedences of color of skin, or the home you grew up in, or the way you talk, or the car you drive. I just want to talk about Mr. King as a man, a man of compassion, justice, and love, and his fight for what was right and what was wrong.

MLK was powerful in every sense of the word. He was powerful in his message, his speech, in his actions, and his influence. And he understood that this kind of power was the unbridled kind that could force an entire country to face what was unjust and lead them to what was right. King could move oceans. He brought humanity. And he was just one man.

Martin Luther King had expectations. And if he could travel to the present, he would be sad to find how this power was lost to millions of individuals who kept it for themselves. Without violence but love, King was able to unveil the truth of mankind and make them see people by "the content of their character."

This isn't a remembrance of Martin Luther King Jr. as the person, but the doctrine. This is to remind everyone that humanity cannot be lost. It's in the hands of every single person. It's in your actions and in your speech. It's in your influence. "I am not interested in power for power's sake, but I'm interested in power that is moral, that is right and that is good."

.............................

"Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."

and this will be a sign

2011-12-25T00:08:00.000-08:00

i love christmas. everything about it. i love the songs. i love the laughter. i love the food. i love the celebration. and usually i've always looked forward to the giving and receiving of presents. i mean, come on, who doesn't? i make mental lists in my head at least a month before of what i want (ahem...post below..) and what i plan on getting friends/family. and once the 26th hits, it's all over. food is put away, stockings taken down, and gift wrapping tossed in the trash. but tonight, i was reminded that in no way is christmas over. christmas has just begun on the eve of the 24th. as cliche as all those reminders of "what christmas is really about" make you wince with guilt, and "how commercialized holidays have become" makes you roll your eyes, you know it's true. the night before christmas i like to think about all the true gifts i have received over the year--the gifts of generosity, forgiveness, health, friendship, warmth, and love---all which were given to me through the sacrifice of jesus christ. it makes me so so happy to know that this is why i'm celebrating christmas.

i hope all of you get what you want this year. i know i've received more than i need. but i know i am loved and undeserving of this love. i wish you all the happiest christmas days ahead!

2 Corinthians 9:15 Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift.

santa dog doesn't want anything to do with me

wishiest wish list

2011-12-05T08:55:00.001-08:00

1. wrap coat
2. studio easel or A-frame easel
3. sheer/cream heart or dot tights
4. white frames of all kinds
5. ear warmers
6. lace up black booties
7. cream colored circle scarf
8. fair isle leggings

also
9. pleather skinnies
10. new apartment accessories

*note this is like the christmas list of my dreams.

this is a happy house

2011-11-29T08:16:00.001-08:00

this day, this week, this month.
- it's weird to switch showers, also it's weird to switch up morning routines
- i officially don't like carpet. it grosses me out.
- red gogi...isn't really anything. what is that flavor exactly?
- all my dreams are short term memories, when am i going to go on adventures again..
- i cannot wait for christmas. can not wait.
- i don't really need anything for christmas, i have everything i want/need snuggling in my bed right now.
- can someone suggest a new drink for me? vodka gingers are getting old.
- if the world was going to end. i don't know.
- these pictures below have nothing to do with this post. they're just nice to look at.
- and
- be curious. not judgemental.

source: ffffound.com | tumblr | pintrest

life goes easy on me

2011-11-23T06:45:00.001-08:00

in blogging tradition i am going to do another T-day post. here it goes:

i am thankful for...
- the most wonderful mom and dad, both have been so generous in the past years, i can't thank them enough.
- my brother who has honorably joined the navy, so proud!
- my chartreuse flannel sheets (that soak up adam's nasy bed sweat)
- all things potatoes: tater tots, french fries, baked potatoes, chips etc
- the benefit of the doubt
- couture and ankle boots
- my job (yay stability)
- huxley bear (the sweetest cutest animal friend)
- adam my soulmate and kindred spirit
- his family and how good they've been to us (and me!)
- law & order svu and house...because watching them makes me feel like i'm an authority on the subjects of law and medicine
- grace
- the hunger games series (katniss is one of my new favorite role models)
- listening to records while cleaning (secrets adam doesn't know about)
- alone time
- pbs sunday morning
- the pen tool in adobe
- ryan adams, bon iver, and the format and lyrics that speak to me
- my friends, old and new
- second, third, and fourth chances
- used paint brushes and a blank canvas
- fart jokes
- and cottonelle wipes
- giggles, snickers, and guffaws
- dark chocolate covered marshmallow you can only get during holidays
- and love.

we're like a lullaby

2011-11-10T07:04:00.000-08:00

source: topshop.tumblr.com, my pinterest.

shoes are my boyfriend.

2011-09-26T11:27:00.000-07:00

all from topshop.tumblr.com

i have the last ones in black. omg those were so hard to come by fer real.

why do designers have names that are hard to pronounce?

2011-09-15T09:23:00.000-07:00

proenza schouler spring 11 rtw.

these are perfect.

glimmer

2011-09-09T07:32:00.000-07:00

we wrote about how this was different
and how much sense this all made
the corners of my mouth went up every time
i read my "we."
if i could capture the individual moments
and string them together, i would tie the ends so tight
double knot it and all
hang them from every beam and corner of my mind
so they could chase away the shadows
that hide until i lose that shine.

it's hot ya'll

2011-07-21T12:56:00.000-07:00

so after living three of the hottest summers consecutively, san antonio -- brooklyn -- norfolk, i say, hands down, norfolk is the worst when it comes to hair.

so. i have THREE (just three things, crazy! i know!) that will help.

1) this shit. it's amazing. and it runs you about $4 at a drugstore. it's light-weight and is the "defense against the dark arts" worthy when it comes to frizz-poofy-humidified-hair-dark-arts. tresemme smooth shine spray. (someone once told me i had commercial shiny hair, i attribute it to this bottled liquid gem.)

2) this bad boy right here. most amazing hair dyer in the world. And I swear it is worth your investment. It will weather-proof your hair for summers and winters to come. it has like 5,323,491 different settings. humidity and dryness beware. they also carry an assortment of crazy hair fighting products--check it here.

3) hair pick. i know. "but helen, you have such tangle-free asian hair!" yeah, well i haven't "brushed" my hair since 5th grade. i get out of the shower and i comb out my long-ass mane. (p.s. thanks britt for giving me your extra one..i still have it..it's been 6 years!)

so there you have it. my hair secrets. you're welcome ya'll.

i am obsesses with..

2011-06-23T07:00:00.000-07:00

orange.black.yellow.bold.blocking.

source:wmag

needs.

2011-06-16T13:30:00.000-07:00

scallops | lace | open toes | metallic

the "anti-hot-mess" wardrobe

2011-06-03T11:25:00.000-07:00

some summer essentials to avoid
the sweatiest season without looking like a hot mess.

let's be honest. i've worn that crop top at least once a week the past month.

and i love the idea of mixing bright shades of green. yes?

Short (see more high waisted shorts)

H M top (see more crop tops)

summer 101

2011-05-26T12:55:00.000-07:00

these are the classes i will be taking:

- summer sandwich making

- thunderstorms: conversations on a porch

- beach: avoiding sand in the bed

- sundresses & shorts

- beach ball throwing

- how to pack a cooler

- colors: an in-depth look into summer shades

- the etiquette of hand-holding

- the best bikini for your body

- music 201: summer hit + sound of waves

you're pretty good looking

2011-05-13T10:54:00.000-07:00

australian fashion week. source: vogue, philip oh.

winter spring

2011-03-25T11:30:00.000-07:00

needs in my life

frozen blooberries

platforms

library smells

smaller chest

a beach bod

my skin to decide if it want's to be pale or tan. c'mon.

bangs sans oiliness

familiar hugs

above 60 degree weather

booze

saturday

2011-03-19T16:54:00.000-07:00

right now i'm watching a marathon of "house" sipping wine (who am i kidding? guzzling) which followed a marathon of sex and the city episodes wondering what i'm going to do tomorrow, next week, month..year. i've also stared at this computer screen deciding between 3 different color palettes for a design for a friend and editing some photos i took last weekend. red couch. sweat pants. and a bright pink "chicago" shirt given by my dad, so worn in it has gigantic holes big enough to fit my head through.

my life has become predictable. and i wonder, am i okay with that? i think so. maybe i expect a lifestyle of exciting events and spontaneous decisions..but when i lived that for a short four months...i envied the person with a routine. a steady job, renting dvds, grabbing bagels, and cleaning on the weekend...pretty much my past few weeks. i got a new job. it's been great and now i'm just waiting for everything else to follow suit..not sure what that is exactly yet (or what that means).

this is my saturday.

rope

2011-03-10T07:49:00.000-08:00

i love these dye dipped ropes from designer Tanya Aguiniga. Also, this shopping site is nicely designed, i love the way they set up all their products.

those colors are perfect for a rainy spring.

source: vitrine

n y f w

2011-02-17T12:59:00.000-08:00

source: times, vogue

valentine.

2011-02-08T11:28:00.000-08:00

Wildfox Love Potion No. 9 Varsity Unisex Tee | Vince skirts GOLD | Freida Lace Shorts by Sretsis at Maximillia

| Deborah Marquit French lace underwired bra | Giuseppe Zanotti Women's E17043 Ankle Boot Kenneth Jay Lane 22-karat gold-plated bib necklace | Candy BOx Purse by La Regale

a little vday inspiration. just a couple hearts, cupcakes, and lace.

dream apartment.

2011-01-27T11:15:00.000-08:00

most come from a cute tumblr called mary ruffle.

i can't wait to decorate my own place. inspired by rustic, blues, greens, cream & whites, fabrics

cute patterns, minimal country.

the day-to-days

2011-01-24T12:40:00.000-08:00

so. i am trying to train my mind to stop making immediate judgments and jumping to the worst conclusions. it's been rather difficult. actually, it's been nearly impossible. my mind sort of goes like this:

(noticing... "what is she wearing?" "that looks horrible." "helen, stop." "has she ever heard of a mirror?" "good for her for not caring..") ...that is a terrible series of thoughts.

(noticing..."what the f*ck, what is wrong with people these days"....fuming....gripping the steering wheel...cursing in my head...)

(noticing..."why is she so pretty and skinny?"..."she must be boring in person"..."oh my god helen, stop this..."..."i'm sure she's an awesome person"..."makes me want to kill myself.."...)

see? a terrible series of thoughts. i wonder if other people do this or am i the only one having this internal struggle with a piss poor mindset and ungrateful thoughts? and how do you just stop it completely before it even enters your mind?

speaking of jealousy and judgement..

the weekend:

spent in bed. all day. watching movies, renting movies, via blockbuster, redbox, ondemand...seriously...it's almost a problem. here's a list of movies:

- the kids are alright

- family guy: it's a trap

- insomnia

- dinner for schmucks

- sex and the city 2

i know, it's a lot.

adam and i eat all our meals in bed (i think there's a phrase that discourages this, but..uh...who cares). we talk about what we did that day, what we want to do tomorrow, and what we want to do next year. we complain, we compliment, we laugh, (sometimes cry), yell, laugh some more, (guffaw), and about 83% of the time we tease and torment each other. i'm excited for a couple things...some will shed light here in a couple weeks...we're also planning on visiting nyc in the middle of february (during fashion week hooray) and then maybe something else. a couple concerts maybe? jimmy eat world...beach house? i definitely need an event to break up the mundane.

what are you all planning in the next couple weeks?

best of:

2011-01-19T11:37:00.000-08:00

best of 2010:

new york.

summer at the beach.

harry potter marathons.

homecoming.

new music.

a virginian fall.

pizza parties.

the frills

2011-01-17T06:06:00.000-08:00

Kurt Geiger.

you'll say, "oh, sing one we know."

2011-01-14T12:08:00.000-08:00

i need a daily reminder telling me. to slow down. to appreciate the details. to be gracious. to be smart. to be understanding. to vocalize. to laugh. to stop thinking. to breathe.

“People universally tend to think that happiness is a stroke of luck, something that will maybe descend upon you like fine weather if you are fortunate enough. But that’s not how happiness works. Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it…”

source: this tumblr (one of my favorites)

happy old year

2011-01-10T13:37:00.000-08:00

less resolutions; more solutions:

- despite the weather (this shall be a brighter year)

- positive positive positive

- i back-tracked a bit in terms of career (but found what i really want to do) -- landed a job (not what i want to do) -- still on a hunt (even if it means backtracking once more

- lessening my emotional load

- cook more; defrost less

- focus on a craft

- love more

- visit my family

- understand

- wash my jeans

- be good, be kind, and remember that everyone is fighting the hardest battle.

source from tumblr & ffffound

the chex mix that was 2010

2011-01-04T13:51:00.000-08:00

the bold and the zesty (every so often a bumpy tasteless stick is thrown in there too..)
analogy fail.

- moving to brooklyn (specifically williamsburg--labeled as the hipster mecca) although i'm tired of this label...
- pursuing my dream of music and design (I WILL GET THERE ONE DAY I SWEAR IT TO BE TRUE)
- finding routine in my oh-so hectic life
- finding adventure in my routine life
- making new friends!
- inside jokes with my best friend
- driving TEN different cars (not sure if that's an accomplishment, but i say it's zesty)
- pretending to get back into painting (i am pathetic)
- I MET A BOY, MOM! (he calls me "dream come true," but honest to moses, i only date him for his butt and eyes...sshh)
- i can finally call san antonio "home." (for a girl who's moved 14 times in her life...this is the most awesome feeling)
- cooking on the real. (but seriously...the other day i made tenderloin steaks with red onion marmalade)
- READING (heaven.)
- surviving all forms of transportation (dank subways, musty cabs (and dollar cabs), freezing airplanes, and the grimiest buses. ever.)
- having the best roommates (mom, dad, claire, adam...)
- morning weekends at charlie's (coffee + veggie omelet + home fries)..i swear "omelet" was spelled more european than that...whatever google..)
- NOT HAVING CABLE OR INTERNET (a bold move if i say so)
- dreaming about moving back to nyc and finding the most awesome career ever (but then spending money on cheap rings and patterned tights...stepping back and being realistic)
- moving THREE TIMES.

i pat you on the back "2010" because when i look on our times together it fills me with great joy. i'm sad, hopeful, and anxious for 2011. surprise me.

christmas wish list 2010

2010-12-17T11:09:00.000-08:00

- light brown leather messenger bag (with a frame shape)..this one is topshop.

- shearling aviator jacket! nasty gal vintage has one for cheap.

- fun pretty jewelry stand this one is $28.

- unique stone/multi-finger rings!

- a pair of neutral slip on loafers (these are steve madden)

- a snood (chunky chunky knits)

- bright pom pom slouch beanie :) (jcrew, but gap and other retailers carry them)

- fuzzy mittens!

- and a belted coat. for cold cold cold nights.

- couldn't find an image, but a neutral watch like this one...crow toddy watch in "bisque."

time.

2010-12-10T11:09:00.000-08:00

last night i was thinking about time. i guess most people see time as

count down,

a sequence,

moments that pass by or moments leading up to

something...usually you see it as numbers lit on a watch or the movement of the hour and minute hand signifying that time is in fact

alive..but last night...i thought of time as a rope.

i had this vision of time being fibers in a rope stretching and loosely and tightly intertwining. a vision of instances in time as a fray in the rope, becoming separated, but always meeting back to the center,

the core.

time distracted and time losing focus, twisting and turning, organized and chaotic.

healthy snax.

2010-12-08T10:48:00.000-08:00

today's foods are all about "healthy" "organic" "natural" "low fat" "gluten free" etc etc etc, but there is way too much information and way too many choices. and for a girl like me, i crave crave crave french fries, chocolate, icecream, all that deliciousness on the reg, but need a healthy alternative to those treats. it's hard/time consuming to sort through all the articles and recommendations without risking and sacrificing flavor for healthy. so here are a list of my favorite healthy snax (because i am a grazer, so i'm told) and i hardly eat real meals.

1. pop chips (all natural / gluten free / no preservatives or artificial flavors)

-i am a huge fan of salty crunchy and these chips are the bomb.com.)

2. fruit leather (100% natural, and a serving of fruits!)

- i like berry flavors..

3. veggie chips

4. no pudge brownies (so much chewier. and sometimes i skip the baking part...)

5. kashi granola bars (they have dark chocolate cherry, and pumpkin. yum.)

6. haagen dazs chocolate ice (dairy free! high-five to those

with IBS/acid reflux)

vulnerable.

2010-11-23T08:51:00.000-08:00

no revelations in the water; no tears in the booze

2010-11-16T07:42:00.000-08:00

No revelations in the water, no tears into the booze

In pains the floor, the worried people shaking the whole house

I take it back. I take it all back.

The regret thats got us sayin,' the hounds upon the tracks

And always in time, I'm never looking over my shoulder

I sing to you. I sing it to you.

Keeping heads above the water and feet into the shoes.

GRR

2010-11-15T11:05:00.000-08:00

bothersome. this is a new list of things that irk me (all prompted by a recent trip to target):

- (in regards to target) bagging my items at the checkout inappropriately. example: putting all my items into one of those GIANT "i-bought-lotsa-sh*t-and-large-electronics" bags. OR. "no, i do not need to put individual items in separate bags, my hand soap can in fact go in the same bag as my tissues. thanks."

- clothes that don't fit on hangers/slide off. wth is the point of those notches in the hanger if they're not going to stop my sweater from sliding off.

- people who update their status unnecessarily. i realize your life may be great, or you're starting a new workout regimen, awesome let's call it bragbook. btw, i definitely don't need to know that you "took pookie bear out for a walk, about to sit down with a bottle of wine and watch grey's with the girlies" every thursday freakin night. bye. deleted from my facebook life.

- cities who make it extremely difficult to recycle. i just need one of those blue containers thanks. i don't want to tie my cardboard in twine and tear labels and metal tabs off things.

- parents who let their children see/pick up their filthy disgusting habits. smoking, eating sh*tty food, driving without a seatbelt, etc. thanks for making this country's future that much brighter.

- loud mouth breathers. (really i'm just mad at your friends for not letting you know)

- the service industry that provides everything BUT service. "what, i wanted ketchup with my fries??" shocker.

- birds.

-bad drivers. you do realize that every time you get into your vehicle it becomes a weapon.

- people who feel the need to tell me about their asian friend or some asian person they know...um..cool? i can start listing all the white people i know too. i'm glad we now relate on a more shallow level.

- your inner-group's slang/terminology. no one else gets it, please stop.

- elitist artsy people. sweet vegan meatloaf and homemade ribbon rings you're selling on etsy. p.s. your friend's indie band sucks, and i don't want to go to your art show.

- families who spend money they don't have. if you're $10,000 in debt and you have three kids, maybe you shouldn't be spending weekends at the mall feeding your kids pretzels from auntie anne's. using your credit card isn't like using monopoly money ya'll.

- neighbors who scream and yell at each other at 4 a.m. i guess "police" and "noise violation" mean nothing to you a**holes.

- my entire gastrointestinal function. my body hates me and it punishes me on the reg.

update

2010-11-04T11:28:00.000-07:00

- I moved out of brooklyn and moved to virginia. (couldn't afford...will be back soon)

- I got a job in VA beach.

- We moved into a new apartment (yes!)

- I bought two garment racks...I like to pretend I'm a stylist to mask the fact that I have no dresser and live out of a suitcase.

- I miss my family & texas.

- But I can't possibly leave here.

Happiness:

- tea

- renting from the redbox

- charlies breakfast

- the smell of old books

- listening to records (and how giddy he gets when he gets a new one)

- wearing fall clothes and winter jackets

- sheets that actually fit on mattresses

- sillies

- waking up every morning next to him

- talking late at night

- red wine and walks

- taking pictures

- watching jeopardy and x-files marathons

- waking up at 6 am on a saturday and knowing i can sleep for at least another 3 hours

- black and white movies

- worn in shirts

- sneaking cookies before bed

this is permanence.

2010-10-26T12:38:00.000-07:00

virginia 2010 | let's take a ride out and see what we find | chapter 2010

between the wish and the thing the world lies waiting.

2010-08-01T21:20:00.000-07:00

my dreams have been in black & white. where did all the color go?

proof.

2010-07-14T17:45:00.001-07:00

despite all the changes i've been going through, all the decisions,
all the problems, mishaps, and mistakes i've made,
i am incredibly happy.

sweet virginia

2010-06-24T15:29:00.000-07:00

(source: tumblr & MEamateurphotgrapher.)

sup ya'll. went to virginia and made it back on the chinatown bus in one piece. phew! spent some time on a beach, lurked a museum, and did other various dumb things. about to head to the brooklyn bowl to see "new deal" should be some good ol'e hipster madness.

due to lack of funds and a strict budget i haven't been keeping up with style news. it only depresses me to see all these fun rompers and summer sandals without any hope of a sweet purchase. i've just come to terms with my new found love for "cheap chic." it's a delicious medley of grunge and hippie style; toss in some tacky costume jewelry, and a sweaty mane. basically i never launder my clothing and definitely do the "smell check" and neatly re-fold my shirts and shorts back onto my shelf, without thinking twice about it. if passengers start shifting away from me during my daily commute, i'll consider a laundry day. consider.

anygay, i'll see you all on the flip side.

steal my records.

2010-06-14T07:33:00.000-07:00

composure. it's what i've been trying to maintain the past couple months. the number and the depth of changes i've been going through seems never-ending. i'm in love with brooklyn. i'm in love with the opportunities and shades of diversity this city continues to offer every single day. but mornings like this, i seek stability and familiarity. and a level of comfort in a routine is something i want to recognize after several weeks of change. i seek consistency in friends, my job, relationships, the produce aisle, nyc metro, support, emotion, and my community. i can't wait for that moment when i've left ny, return, and receive that feeling of home.

here is a list of things i appreciate so far:

- 24 hour everything (bagels, sandwiches, laundry, dance parties)

- physically fit neightbors (seriously, it's hard to be fat in nyc)

- not being questioned (i had the biggest stain on my neon spandex shorts and not one person thought or looked twice...stain has been removed btw)

- $1 book sales (it's like a literary heaven here)

- blogs devoted to brooklyn and being poor (i am not alone!)

- hana foods (the bikini sherman sandwich has saved my life. seriously.)

- the music (enough said. i can't get enough.)

- the art (on the street, on the exposed brick, on the pavement, in homes)

- vegan food (delicious delicious vegan food, i'm not even vegan. or vegetarian.)

- my roommate (she is the best "begin my life in nyc" roommate there ever was)

- my AC unit (you go brenda, keep on truckin.)

here is a list of things i do not appreciate (aside from the obvious):

- empty promises (people can be so disappointing)

-nyc pavement (full of urine, feces, condom wrappers, probably drugs and sexually transmitted disease)

- slow pedestrians (there should be a minimum speed limit on the sidewalks)

- people who talk shit (i will be the first to say that i can be hypocritical, but some people seem to make it their life without even realizing)

- dirty dirty hipsters (please shower...please..)

- our water pressure / shower head (you are an inconsistent slut and i hope one day you can decide if you want to be hot, cold, a trickle, or an actual shower. thanks.)

- pigeons. (i do not believe in animal cruelty, but if a sudden pigeon genocide occurred...i would definitely look the other way..and to the one that perches itself on my AC unit at 4 am every morning, we're fighting.)

- raiding grandma's closet (some girls should recognize that this too can be a form of birth control...just sayin)

but at the end of the day, i'm still happy(ier) than i was 4 months ago. i've made some pretty dumb mistakes, i'm still learning, and i hope guidance will come to me in my moments of crisis and confusion. guh-bye.

on the real.

2010-06-09T16:18:00.000-07:00

a visit from norfolk. indulged at economy candy. and by indulged i broke out due to sugar overload. central park-ed it. danced. drank. and now my lymph nodes are swollen and i'm vegging out to a marathon of "that 70s show." good news tho: free dance party and free vodka from 11-12. oh you know.

sorry for the kissy/incoherence in pictures.

yer so bad.

2010-05-28T10:24:00.000-07:00

(source: tumblr, ffffound)

the rugged american? don't see too much of this look here in brooklyn.
fringe, (p)leather, feathers, sepia tone, and beat up denim.
i'm excited for the weekend for the mere fact of not having any plans.
lame i realize, but no plans equals thriftiness..and this
virtue is becoming more and more appealing every day.
but i think i'm more excited for next weekend.

brokelyn.

2010-05-23T22:04:00.000-07:00

a compilation of my happenings so far. giant margs at the park. hipster watching. music. city lights. lollipops. bagels. fat kids on bikes. now i just need to post about clothes....hmm...how is everyone else doing?

cyberland

2010-05-14T09:13:00.000-07:00

I AM SO MIA.

(no internet, no cable, i can't remember what i used to do without being cyber-ly connected.)

i will be back with hell of an update.

btw the amount of vintage stores is insane. it is taking all of my willpower not to blow all my money on scuffed up boots and satin nighties.

momentary phase

2010-04-30T11:58:00.000-07:00

today is my last day at work. i am jetting off to va on sunday, then driving up to brooklyn thursday.
i am ridiculously ready for this move to happen, to start my internships, and get a move on, achieve my goals. leave me with some suggestions of cheap or FREE things to do in nyc. anything quirky fun, unusual non-touristy things. xox.

oh and follow my twatter.

love you floozies.

they don't know what we know

2010-04-25T14:33:00.000-07:00

I had the pleasure of ordering something off LuShae Jewelry. They had so many options to choose from, rings, bracelets, earrings, and pendants...but I went with this really awesome mosaic ring (stepping stone ring) with 14K gold, rose gold, and white gold. stunning. It's super sparkly and pretty much goes with any outfit or jewelry since it's got so many shades of metal. Ya'll need to check it out, some sweet earrings here, very much worth your while. Don't let my demented face mislead you.

PS I move to NYC in TWO FREAKING WEEKS. There will be another post soon with pictures from my new DSLR cam and details on the BIG GINORMOUS MOVE. so stoked.

concrete fields & a city glow

2010-04-21T08:13:00.000-07:00

(source: tumblr, ffffound)

NYC trip was an absolute success. I came across several wonderful opportunities, which I would love to share, maybe some other time. After a full weekend in NY I was inspired through so many ways. The avenues, the boulevards, a simple crumpled up paper cup lying next to a worn in park bench, I want to soak it all in. The city is incredibly raw, but there is an unique soft and beautiful way the smoke and light surrounds the buildings that I see it originate from a source very organic. I definitely feel at home. These pictures above remind me of all these things. In terms of style and fashion, confidence, pops of color, shades of gray, soft billowy textures, matched with hardware, and vulgarity--this is the city.

I am in need of some cheap furniture, so if you know of anyone (or is wanting to sell) basic furnishings let me know. I wish you all the best week, love ya'll. Peace & Brains.

horizontal | vertical

2010-04-12T09:13:00.000-07:00

(source: ffffound/here comes the sun tumblr)

just bought an oversized striped pullover, mine is a little more nautical,
but i love the way these girls are wearing it.

i'm going to nyc this weekend, and i am beyond excited. i am looking for apartments in the brooklyn area with my future roommate.
it will also be my birthday on sunday...might get a tattoo to mark
the occasion of being 23, starting a new life, and turning a new leaf. we're trying to figure out staying arrangements for cheap.
any suggestions? love ya floozies. go be crazy.

get off the radio already lady gaga.

2010-04-06T16:51:00.000-07:00

(source: tumblr, ffffound, this one really cool blog and i can't remember the link. sorry)

hello turd brains,
i think it's time for a summer post. next one?
i am going to go buy a very large embarrassing floppy hat this weekend.
possibly some new jeans because my $14 favorite ones have failed the
brutality test. my fingers. ripping them to shreds because i thought it was funny.
not so funny the next morning. oops.
fringe me?

maybe today, we can put the past away

2010-04-03T17:59:00.000-07:00

sometimes i think blogging is passive aggressive. in general, posting thoughts, calling for action, or voicing opinion on the internet is plain old passive, but...i must roll with the times...must move with the wind and try not to fight the current. so this is me. being a hypocrite. oh well, i'm human. to be honest, sometimes the tapping away at my keys and a click of a mouse can be more satisfying than the rough scribbles of my fine tip sharpie on my sketchbook. i think this LED screen is less intimidating than a blank page staring at me, mocking me almost, daring me to write something profound and permanent. i will warn you that this post may be slightly vague, and i definitely will not promise you anything in the form of eloquence or grammatical correctness. so, if you're just an innocent by-passer scanning through my blog expecting pretty pictures and a few terse sentences, you might as well hit the back page button.

since this post seems to be going in the direction of vagueness and generalities, i think a lot of people who consider them a part of my life only know the vague and the general. if you think reading my blog, occasionally commenting on the anecdotes of my twitter page, browsing through my recent wall posts, popping in through my gchat, or sending me a "funny" text is being a part of my life then i would say you are under the category of a passive friendship. hey, i will say that i take part in this shallow exchange. sure i'll respond, maybe update you on what "i did the past weekend" or reciprocate by sending you a funny link, but then we've both established the seriousness of our relationship and that's that. if, in the past couple weeks, i've tried to call, maybe we've sent a couple lengthy e-mails back and forth, i'm trying to make an effort here, while managing to stay within a level of comfort without coming off too strong or straightforward. like i said, the internet and a text makes confronting something less intimidating. i'm definitely not trying to sever ties or even make any cliche grande statements like "i'm finding out who my true friends are" or anything of that nature, i'm just noticing things. and that you probably have a shallow understanding of my life. i'm also making the dumb assumption that people care haha because if you don't well...then i guess none of this applies to you. carry on.

maybe re-evaluate is the word. and maybe i am a horrible friend and a friendship with me is really not worth holding onto. i really can't answer that for you or myself. haha sometimes i have these crazy conversations in my head doubting the substance and quality of my being. (also, the dialogue in my head is just pretty nuts itself.) i'm not looking for a sudden influx of phone calls and heart-to-hearts or anything, i just want to see something genuine. and you know, i probably do talk too much about myself, and this can come off entirely self-centered, but whatever. i want real. i want not only some typed message on a screen, but i need support. and maybe some people don't deserve this explained to them nor should i have to explain myself either. ha.

consider this clarification, even if you didn't ask for it. i do want deeper friendships, relationships, and i want to keep doors open. but i need a soul meets body.

(also to clarify, i am actually almost 23 haha, and i have a tendency to have the antics, dreams and desires of a child...so that might explain the "immature" list in the post below)

this entire post is slightly immature. oh well. p.s. did you know that yoo-hoos aren't actually milk-based? explains a lot.

you're guiltless and free; I hope you take a piece of me with you

2010-04-01T17:29:00.000-07:00

(source: random? desktop? tumblr?)

my "what-i-want-to-do-before-i-become-a-huge-adult-bore" list:

1. build a tree house
2. write a song, perform it on a stage
3. become so immersed in a painting that i ignore everyone/everything for a week; seclusion
4. fall in love multiple times (not just people, books, music, God)
5. make a parrot repeat a word for me
6. sew a dress
7. have a tea party
8. lie in the grass and discuss the shapes of clouds
9. re-learn some calculus (weird i know)
10. live in ny

(for right now...)

she likes hair bands on satellite radio

2010-03-30T07:33:00.000-07:00

(source: ffffound.com)

sxsw was crazy. can't wait to partake in more music festivals, concerts, and shows this year. what's your favorite "hair band"? i would say aerosmith/van halen are mine. i think you can classify them as a hair band. whatever.

any new music i should buy? any new trends i should risk my style sanity for? should i even care? probably not...

it's tuesday, go play outside.

and i say it's alright

2010-03-24T10:27:00.000-07:00

(source: ffffound)

light. shed light. new light. light up. lights on. lights off. true light. ray of light.
lighten up. light the way. light load. light bulb. light layers. uv light. lightweight. sunlight.

and i kissed you in a style that clark gable would have admired

2010-03-17T13:14:00.000-07:00

heading to sxsw this weekend. so excited. the line-up is pretty amazing: metric, memory tapes, antlers, she & him, cave singers, minus the bear, broken social scene, miike snow, sondre lerche...so much i wish i could see it all. if any of you are going to be there, let me know! i would love to grab a drink/share musical interests with some fellow bloggers.

thanks again for all the comments, i think i will post photos of my own outfits sometime soon..unfortunately my camera is dumb and i haven't been able to do so.

song of the day - clark gable - postal service.

kiss with a fist

2010-03-12T11:09:00.000-08:00

(source: wmag)

hello moodiness. start your weekend off right.

i swear when i grow up, i won't just buy you a rose.

2010-03-08T13:47:00.000-08:00

(source: ffffound)

inspired by funfetti cupcakes, tea parties, alice in wonderland, and everything candy wrapped.
where is the weekend already?

eh, follow my twitter.

you try to drag me into your bohemian dancing

2010-03-04T07:29:00.000-08:00

**this motojacket look was styled by Ivania from love aesthetics, go check it out!**

(source: ffffound)

how do ya'll feel about hats? do you think the trend is over? trying too hard? i'm not sure...i guess it's the attitude that comes with them.

by the way, that song in my blog title pretty much sums up my life/past couple weeks haha. and why hasn't anyone mentioned that the followill brothers are complete studs?

i would like to thank you all for leaving such great comments. i read every single one, and i try to look at everyone's blog that comments and usually follow the blog. i love the community of the style/art blog world. ya'll are lovely.

love will tear us apart.

2010-03-01T06:56:00.000-08:00

(source: tumblr, ffffound)

i just want to be rock n' roll. don't you? i'm in such a punk rock phase right now.
who are some of your favorite bands? and does the music you listen to influence your style?

i want to wear tights and no bottoms, dramatic capes, throw on some heavy liner, and riot.
speaking of music, sxsw is around the corner! love you all.

and a warm bed, well that's something, but that alone just ain't enough

2010-02-22T08:56:00.000-08:00

(source: ffffound, tumblr)

i love the simple white button up, tucked in, and paired with a high-waisted bottom. i love furry feathery details. and hair in the face. i had a weekend in austin: dancing, ridiculous wedges, stealing boxes of condoms out of random rooms, being offered a part of the cast of "scooby doo" and driving around in their shag van...sounds shady. might reconsider. mimosas and brunch. what did you all do? let's hope it's better than that bogus.

if you're on twitter, follow me! you might be occasionally entertained with random "helen-isms." if not, unfollow me. it's no big deal.

life goes on, long after the thrill of livin is gone.

2010-02-17T10:11:00.000-08:00

(source: ffffound, tumblr, sartorialist)

just some melloncamp to liven up your week. a nyfw post should come soon, i'm just feeling a little overwhelmed. although there are a few surprises and unpredicted trends that have been happening on the runway, that's exciting. nyfw should be unpredictable. but i think us bloggers, are a little ahead of the game, it's hard to surprise us. ;)

p.s. thank you all for the comments and etc, you all are great, and give me reason to keep posting and being apart of art & fashion every day.

when there is nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire

2010-02-13T14:55:00.000-08:00

(source:tumblr. others?)

happy about fashion week and all of its updates. really sad about the mcqueen news. a serious genius.

spent $125 on a bottle last night (how did that happen. i just think i could have spent that on a new jacket/shoes/or something) grrr.
i guess this is what the kids call reckless. herm?

is it snowing in space?

2010-02-09T12:54:00.000-08:00

(source: tumlbr, heidi slimane)

i like that more style bloggers have become more personal on their sites. because really, fashion is art, art is inspirational, and my inspiration changes when changes occur in my personal life. it's all connected. let's get personal.

i'm listening to ryan adams. musical and lyrical genius. it's been a lot of velvet underground, noah and the whale, and bon iver lately. can someone suggest something else equally as moody and melodic?

calendar girl

2010-02-08T13:37:00.000-08:00

(source: teenvogue)

the celebrities are jumping on the bandwagon. do you think they read our fashion/style blogs? but gennifer goodwin looks absolutely stunning, girl can really clean up nicely.

facing my generation alone

2010-02-08T09:46:00.000-08:00

(source:tumblr, all saints, topshop)

i am a huge fan of the 90s grunge look (and menswear) that's been going on the past year. i bought 3 oversized men's shirts, bulky sweaters, and some hats this weekend. i just need a pair of rugged boots
(but i have weird thing about buying shoes that make my foot look big. any suggestions??)

i'll be holding all the tickets

2010-02-05T11:56:00.000-08:00

(source:tumblrs)

to me, style is comfortable. it is easy. it is uncomplicated. it is flattering. it is confident. it is fun. it is an escape. it is "you."

p.s. looking into moving to NY in april. if you know of any opportunities as a graphic designer/blogger/fashion enthusiast/art lover, please please let me know! (leave a comment or e-mail at helensta@gmail.com)

and thank you all for leaving these wonderful comments, i love sharing my ideas/thoughts, and i enjoy browsing through all ya'lls blogs as well (leave a link, i'll check them out) xox

cross your Ts

2010-02-03T11:57:00.000-08:00

(source: fashiongonerogue)

i know they're just t-shirts, but come on. if you wear them like hannah holman and are photographed by daniel jackson, they're more than just a t-shirt.

tuesday is almost thursday which is almost friday.

2010-02-02T13:24:00.000-08:00

(source: tumblrs out the wazoo)

i like to post pictures that could possibly inspire your clothing choice. or maybe art? yes. oh and does ANYONE know of WHERE i can buy a jacket like the last picture for a reasonable price???? suggestions would be fantastic. i want that asymmetrical flap as soon as possible.

saab saab saab SOB.

2010-01-28T13:49:00.000-08:00

i had to post these pictures because it was too much of a blog lover's gem not to...i felt obligated. elie saab spring/summer 2010.
this is pretty much everything i want in a couture line for 2010. soft colors, soft fabrics, texture, shimmer, and nude nude nude. love love love. how incredible are the details? the hair the make up. the flume. the sheer.

cosmic disco late night tea parties

2010-01-27T06:53:00.000-08:00

oscar de la renta.

miu miu on the left. marc jacobs on the right. gah.

bluemarine blue chiffon.

(source: wmag)

sullen load is full; so slow on the spit

2010-01-25T07:28:00.000-08:00

not to mention i would die for this dress and color.

my new color inspiration at the moment. this will soon transition into pale pale grey blues (cool hues) to hot bright burnt orange (cool/warm hue). (in terms of design/paintings) i am really excited.

okay i realize...

2010-01-22T06:31:00.000-08:00

(source: tumblrs, elle)

i have a slight obsession with natalie portman. but. i can't help myself. the girl is so dang beautiful and inspiring. plus, i feel i owe it to seth at least once in a while.

you're golden

2010-01-18T08:35:00.000-08:00

(source: tfs, huffingtonpost)

my favorite is sandra bullock. she is beautiful, stunning, love her. meryl streep threw down. seriously, she looks amazing. i love the color of drew barrymore's dress, but the poofness on her hip...not so much for the red carpet. january jones does no wrong. kate hudson's shoes. want. and trueblood was my favorite couple.

you fox.

2010-01-14T08:02:00.000-08:00

(source:wildfox.com)

love wildfox couture. wish i could dress in loose tees, short shorts, tutus, and neon colors everyday...:)
oh and i'm an aries, i want that shirt! daredevil ;)

no fate but what we make

2010-01-13T07:28:00.000-08:00

dreams of the city. dreams of the country. both black and white. both wrapped in color.

make the queen of angels sigh

2010-01-11T07:39:00.000-08:00

(source: tumblrs)

amazing weekend.
curious to know what the style trends of 2010 will be...any predictions?

whim&magic

2010-01-07T06:47:00.000-08:00

(source: fffound [most via vogue italia jan 2008])

i'm feeling like believing in a little magic.

the golden state wins again

2010-01-06T21:31:00.000-08:00

teeny glimpse into my life and my face.

close friends. hugs. arcade games. drankz. the same jacket for, like, 6 months. and coffee.

please excuse any poor quality images. i suck. :)

twilight galaxy

2010-01-04T07:21:00.000-08:00

(source: tumblrz)

new INSPIRATION year

2009-12-30T18:37:00.000-08:00

i love this model off duty natalie style. i want a furry lbd.

this pretty much sums up what i wear to work everyday. blazer, boyf jeans, wingtip flats. whatevs.

rachel bilson.

(source: tumblr mostly, ?, sartorialist)

resolute.

2009-12-29T17:34:00.000-08:00

- reduce negativity

- produce positivity
- improve my portfolio
- bathe more (..eh)
- stay in touch
- find my lost imaginary pony/dragon
- finish painting this damn series
- bite my tongue
- trust my abilities
- get out of san antonio
- watch those movies i've been saying i will watch
- read those books i've been meaning to read
- judge less
- form a hybrid acdc/simon&garfunkel/janis joplin/beach boys singing troupe.
- not explain myself.

keep on keep on keep on.
slow down and savor.

new years 2009. that's my best girfran, i miss her!

prefall (what???)

2009-12-28T11:07:00.000-08:00

VERA WANG

BURBERRY. i want that red velvet cake looking coat. now.

THAKOON

i cannot believe it's prefall season already. i am noticing a pattern in most prefall collections.

christmas sun

2009-12-24T15:06:00.000-08:00

this is christmas this is 2009

- a warmer sun and a vaster sky
- dusty boots
- cubicles and extra forehead wrinkles
- breakfast burritos (not that great)
- a dislike for eggnog, even with alcohol
- ignoring a corporate dress code
- more love for a tasty red wine
- coffee, tea, coffee, tea
- no mistletoe :(
- pies
- those weekend vacas to my alma mater
- no showers, stocking up on dry shampoo
- i still believe there is a santa
- i still believe in a savior
- road rage (i honk my horn. ari would be so proud)
- scrubbing oil paint off my carpet more than once
- health care is doomed.
- humanity is not doomed.
- using body wash as shampoo
- spilling coffee in my bath-- a coffee bath!
- tearing up every time i see a dead animal in the road (i'm becoming a sentimental freak)
- quoting kidd kraddick and chelsea handler daily
- missing christmas and the holidays with my bestfrans on the east coast
- missing my roommates
- twitter addict
- crushes
- new music: john mayer, blind pilot, anya marina, florence + the machine. rediscovering: kings of convenience, bon iver, imogen heap, yeah yeah yeahs, hall & oates.
- sonic tater tots < dhall tater tots
- bing crosby's christmas
- a grey, black, cream, nude, beige, and white color palette wardrobe
- making lists
- re-evaluating everything
- seth philz coming for new years
- e-mailing! please e-mail, i promise i send lengthy e-mails back
- my love for all things gory and zombie like
- vegan baking
- love, passion, forgiveness, honesty, dignity, tolerance, and again love.

merry christmas everyone

palette

2009-12-21T12:23:00.000-08:00

(source: wmag)

color palette in my closet now. asap.

knitzz

2009-12-15T07:39:00.000-08:00

(source: ellemag)

i'm wishing they had a knit onesie.

laundry list: love

2009-12-09T10:52:00.000-08:00

(source: tumblr, weheartit)

When people say "Love is often times confused with lust," I think they must be novices on the subject of love. I think love is often times confused with feelings and qualities of excitement, joy, intention, comfort, sadness, need, anger, possibility, understanding, and a million other unexplainable emotions. I believe all of these can be associated with love, but I think what sets it apart from the real and the artificial are elements of forgiveness, grace, sacrifice, magic, truth, and honesty. In many ways love is the closest thing we have to divinity on this earth, and it's an incomparable gift we take for granted. It surrounds my life through my friendships, relationships, food (nature) and in myself. I love love; I do believe it can conquer all, and I really don't care how naive that may make me sound. boo yah.

portman

2009-12-08T16:39:00.000-08:00

(source: marieclaire.com)

she is the coolest and prettiest vegetarian ever. it's sad when you see a phone number next to the most goregous lanvin dress price and the words "upon request."

maliceinwonderland

2009-12-08T16:06:00.000-08:00

(source: justjared)

could taylor swift get any uglier. darn her.

thanksgivingturkey

2009-11-26T12:22:00.000-08:00

i am thankful for:

- my family
- a warm bed and food on the table
- my amazing wonderful friends (you know who you are)
- pumpkerz (my nugget dog)
- opportunities i've had / new opportunities
- the ability to love
- forgiveness
- second chances
- an active digestive system
- colors
- texas (although sometimes you drive me nuts)
- inside jokes
- sadness
- jmu
- a world that has a chance to be better
- democracy
- baby animals
- laughter and the people who make me laugh
- new beginnings
- relationships
- the new people i've met and become closer with the past couple years
- all working limbs
- music
- the combination of marshmallow and chocolate
- being a woman
- the invention of soap
- understanding
- and all of you reading this

love

sunsun

2009-11-22T10:39:00.000-08:00

(source: altamiranyc, hanneli)

some sunday inspiration for the upcoming week.

daul kim

2009-11-19T12:35:00.000-08:00

(source: russh)

rip daul kim. a real pioneer for asian models. also a had a great blog at iliketoforkmyself.

old moon

2009-11-19T09:54:00.000-08:00

(source: mtv&teenvogue)

another obligatory new moon post. i must say robert pattinson looks spectacs in gucci. calvin klein turned taylor lautner into a man. kristin stewart looks awkward as always. and what's-her-face's red dress ashley green looks like it's from the 90s..so does nikki whatever. that silver burberry is just no bueno on her. and that hands on hip pose looks like it was taken on thursday at jimdels. i'm not a hater, i love twilight, but as chelsea handler said last night, "remember when twilight used to be a time of day?"

oh wait, dakota fanning looks amazing. damn her.

simplex

2009-11-19T09:27:00.000-08:00

(source: nylon)

lookbook from CUSHNIE ET OCHS. apparently this lookbook was compiled, styled, and shot as these 2 models were walking off the runway..pretty nifty. it does feel a little improv'd, but less boring and predictable. i do love the second to last white dress of the cut out mesh upper thighs. and we all know i'm a sucker for that apricot/peachy color.

the room

2009-11-18T06:45:00.000-08:00

(source: fashiongonerogue)

a moody editorial from the hungarian magazine "the room" photographed istvan labady.

reverse

2009-11-18T06:34:00.000-08:00

(source: wmag)

hi demi. do you ever age? like at all?

prads

2009-11-12T09:05:00.000-08:00

(source: wmag)

kate moss in prada.

big love

2009-11-09T10:04:00.000-08:00

(source: fashiongonerogue, vogue italia november)

uh girl can take a photograph. for real. amanda seyfriend from that lame
movie mamma mia and that show big love (i never really watched).

in anything

2009-11-06T10:20:00.000-08:00

(source:papertissue)

if you haven't spoken to me in the past month
if you can't remember the parts that mean most
if you're interested only to satisfy your own curiosity
if you make promises you cannot keep
if you talk to me everyday, but any of the above apply
get out please. thanks.

okay once more..

2009-11-04T07:24:00.000-08:00

thank you harper's bazaar.
i do think that the one close-up pic of their upper half, has a sort of a weird angelina jolie/brad pitt thing going on...and she looks strange..

A+ to the motorcycle image. hot sequin number.

acneee

2009-11-03T12:56:00.000-08:00

(via refinery29)

acne's new lower-end spring 2010 lookbook. i like. i guess the trend is getting more
farm-boy/girl/esque.

oh hi

2009-11-02T09:25:00.000-08:00

(source:vanityfair)

i love seeing him eat corn-on-the-cob and wearing thick knit sweaters. although he's looking a bit restless...

xoxo

2009-11-02T08:56:00.000-08:00

(source: nylon)

i would hang out with this chic. and her dog.