By: Lisa Jones1. Your well-muscled left forearm. Conveniently located directly above the very first thing I notice: your ring finger.
2. Your skin tone. 1 percent increase in tan = 47 percent increase in muscle tone.
3. Your resemblance to a rock. The Rock, Kid Rock, and all the rocks in between are equally attractive. So stop worrying about your body type. I like them all.
4. Your lungs. When you suck in your gut to impress me, I'm charmed silly.
5. Your stride. I love watching a man who's confident and in shape enough to run shirtless on the beach. You're barefoot, too? My heart is racing.
6. Your swim trunks. No Speedos, please. Just something stylish that shows off your moneymaker.
7. Your moneymaker. It's not what you're thinking . . . I mean those lines that start near your hips and plummet down to your groin. They make you extremely hot . . . and me very, very bothered.
8. Your resemblance to Spider-Man. Women think Tobey Maguire is sexy. And you look like you can totally kick his ass.
9. Your calves. Especially when you're playing volleyball, sprinting for the Frisbee, riding your bike, or on your hands and knees helping a 5-year-old dig a sandcastle moat.
10. Your body in jeans . . . and a linen dress shirt with rolled-up sleeves and a backward baseball cap, all while you're splashing around with your black Lab in the surf at sunset. No, you're not wearing or doing that now. But I'm imagining you are, and you look freaking fetching.
11. Your rear view. Three words: lower-back dimples.
12. Your activity level. Have you been lying out? Or working out?
13. Your shoulder muscles. At some point I will determine whether you're strong enough to save me when I pretend to be caught in the undertow.
14. Your brainpan. Turn the right kind of pages and you can really turn me on. What are you readingâ€”Melville? Or Maxim?
15. Your accessories. Sunglasses and thong flip-flops = instant appeal.
16. Your attire. Salty, sandy, sun-kissed, and wearing a well-worn white T-shirt? I don't care what's under your shirt, because I can only think about getting naked.
17. Your courage. You didn't dip your toe to test the water before jumping in.
18. Your eyes. My eyes are open under these Jackie O. sunglasses, boy, and I can see you checking me out.
19. Your beer belly. A small one's not so bad. A tiny bit of soft flesh over the waistband is forgivable. (Just don't look like you swallowed the keg.)
20. Your belly button. Innie? Outie? Doesn't matter. Weirdly erotic, either way.
you can go to the actual article here.
this is "The Frisky's" response to Men's Health article, which i think is pretty funny, but still not hitting the mark.